My first video call with my mentor was a real eye-opener. Lasting just over an hour, we managed to cover quite a lot, and I left feeling more focused and organised about what was ahead. One of the first things we discussed was how I wanted to keep our conversations informal. It makes it much easier for me to chat openly without feeling awkward.
I also realised how much better video calls are than texting. You can communicate much more clearly over video, with emotions and expressions that don’t come across in written messages. Being able to talk face-to-face made the conversation flow better and helped me feel comfortable.
We spent a good amount of time discussing how I struggle with balancing college work and doing the things I enjoy, especially with ADHD. I explained how hard it is for me to stay focused, keep to a timetable, and actually get things done when I’m constantly distracted or just unmotivated. Procrastination is a big issue for me, and the more I put things off, the harder it becomes to get started on anything.
My mentor was really understanding and offered some suggestions, making it clear she was speaking as a mentor, not a medical professional. One of the ideas was to create a timetable, breaking tasks down into smaller chunks so they feel less overwhelming. She also suggested taking breaks between work sessions to help manage my focus and energy. Another thing she recommended was setting up a reward system, basically giving myself something to look forward to once I’ve completed my work. It could be gaming, music, or even just a quick snack or break.
These ideas gave me something to think about and although a lot of them were things I had already tried and failed, we did get something out of it. She decided that she would adapt her approach to mentoring me and be sending more messages to check up on tasks that I’m meant to be doing so there’s a bit more pressure as I work better under pressure.
We also talked about some more personal stuff, like how tough it can be growing up in a family without generations of British heritage. I explained how family responsibilities take up a lot of my time, leaving me with very little free time to myself. When I do get that time, I value it so much that it makes me even less motivated to do my college work. It felt good to talk about this with someone who understands how tricky it can be to manage everything.
Towards the end of the call, we started talking about future plans. My mentor gave me a task to research at least five degree apprenticeships in engineering, something I’m interested in pursuing. She asked me to find out things like the requirements, pay, location, and the application process for each apprenticeship. This would help me start thinking about my next steps after college. We also talked about the need to start drafting my personal statement, which she will be helping me with and advising me on.
As the programme was nearing its end, I knew that focusing on my personal statement was becoming a priority. My mentor and I had discussed how important it was to get this done, especially with deadlines approaching. We made plans to review my first draft of it together already and as a final task, I wanted to ensure that it reflected my academic goals and personal experiences. I felt much more prepared to tackle this as we initially set goals and boundaries.
This journey, which is now coming to an end, has helped me feel a lot more comfortable and confident about my next steps and I’m immensely grateful for the guidance I’ve received!
This is the second blog of a series. You can read Nadia’s first blog here or find out more about our Brightside Mentoring Programme here.
